Saturday, October 28, 2006
this is an attempt to revive my blog! hah. by popular demand. hm. maybe not.
WOW. more than a year has pass. from my pre-NS days. went thru quite a deal this one year.
got to know a great bunch of pple from squad 57 during my police training days, to now my working in TRACOM, even during the ops con to woodlands NPC. just wanna thank God for bringing me to all these wonderful pple in my NS life.
i think i'd just highlight a few events during this year. like going to beijing, NS, and my 21st birthday.
i certainly enjoyed my beijing trip! it brought me so much closer to the chinese culture and stuff! made me want to go into research more on it. bought so many books on ethnomusicology!
hm. i thought NS is kinda a waste of time initially, but. yeah. i've learn to take it as a passing phase. and i've still another year to go! ahhh.
my 21st yo bday. hah! really wanna thank all the ppl who turned up! my family, my sec sch friends, my ACJC friends, my NS friends, my band friends, ms kat lim, alvin and EVERYONE. also those absence with apologies due to work. HAH. u guys have made my birthday a really memorable one. THANKS!
yeah. this year's bday is kinda special. probably. cos i met the person of my life? hah. hopefully so.
ahhhh. im running out of ideas to blog. well. effect of NS. makes u...... D_MB.
that's all folks.
jovan blogged at 1:35 PM
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Sunday, November 13, 2005
No more talk of darkness,
forget these wide-eyed fears;
I'm here, nothing can harm you,
my words will warm and calm you.
Let me be your freedom,
let daylight dry your tears;
I'm here, with you, beside you,
to guard you and to guide you.
Say you'll love me ev'ry waking moment;
turn my head with talk of summertime.
Say you need me with you now and always;
promise me that all you say is true,
that's all I ask of you.
Let me be your shelter,
let me be your light;
you're safe, no one will find you,
your fears are far behind you.
All I want is freedom,
a world with no more night;
and you, always beside me,
to hold me and to hide me.
lThen say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime;
let me lead you from you solitude.
Say you need me with you, here beside you,
anywhere you go, let me go too,
that's all I ask of you.
Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime.
Say the word and I will follow you.
Share each day with me, each night, each morning.
Say you love me.
You know I do.
Love me, that's all I ask of you.
Anywhere you go let me go too
Love me, that's all I ask of you.
jovan blogged at 4:52 PM
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Friday, November 04, 2005
i saw all these passionate pple reel about,
drift haphazardly as if driven by a storm,
the man filled with desire today,
satiated on the morrow,
loving fiercely and discarding brutally,
sure of no affection and happy in no love;
then there were the women who were infatuated with him,
suffering insults and beatings,
finally rejected,
yet clinging to him,
degraded by jealousy and despised love,
but still remaining faithful...
like dogs...
jovan blogged at 3:01 AM
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Tuesday, November 01, 2005
"when i take a look at my life,
as though from the outside,
it does not appear particularly happy...
yet i am even less justified
in calling it unhappy,
despite all its mistakes...
afterall, its foolish to keep probing
for happiness or unhapiness,
for it seems to me it would be hard
to exchange the unhappiest days
of my life for all the happy ones...
if what matters in a person's existence
is to accept the inevitable conciously,
to taste the good and bad to the full,
and to make for oneself a more individual,
unaccidental and inward destiny alongside
one's eternal fate,
then my life has been neither empty nor worthless...
even if, as it is decreed by the gods,
fate has inexorably trod over
my external existence as it does with everyone,
my inner life has been of my own making...
i deserve its sweetness,
and bitterness,
and accept full responsibility for it..."
jovan blogged at 7:05 PM
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Friday, October 28, 2005
rainy season it has been.. haven't been blogging for some time.. this is for yina.. yeah.. i'll talk about my fantasies soon yeah? my deepest darkest secret (or is it darkest deepest secret?).. doesn't really matter..
was just sitting around.. peeped out of the window.. what a beautiful sight of the sun i saw! indeed.. after all the rain, storm, thunder and lightnings.. there will be a sunny day..
i guess we often dont see the sunny day ahead of us.. we just see the negative side of things so often.. and when its sunny.. we dont appreciate these sunny days, and often take for granted that its sunny..
just as in life.. when we're going thru a rough patch.. we feel as if we're in the darkest point in life.. nothing just seem to be right.. do we actually see the "sunshine" which is bound to come?
well.. the old saying goes well.. "when the going gets tough.. the tough gets going!"...
jovan blogged at 11:35 AM
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Sunday, October 16, 2005
lol! after that post.. yina wants me to show the BIGGEST gift i've ever received.. in terms of size.. lol.. it took lotsa effort too! like.. yina, ivy, and of cos yina's family members! when i first met her aunties and uncles, they were like.. "OH! so u were the guy we were rushing the puzzle for!" lol.. was abit paiseh.. but i truly appreciate it.. thanks girl! its seriously wonderful! dont worry.. its hanging nicely in my room.. and every visitor is impressed.. its like 3000 over pieces of hard-work?
okay.. next.. is a gift from tammy.. lol! this is a hand-made using dont know what.. lol.. cant remember.. acrylic paint or something.. which stained her whole hand.. i think.. its for my 17th birthday.. yeah.. thanks girl!
ooh.. lol.. next on the list.. anyhow.. the gifts are just in random order.. okok.. next on the list is this monopoly set.. given to me by my farkov brothers.. lol! davis, wennie, tim and law eng.. u might think its just a monopoly set.. BUT.. NO! its a china set! woohoo.. lol.. cos they they think i suck in chinese.. so they got me this hoping that it might help me improve my chn.. too bad.. we only played it once! lol.. aww.. anyhow.. this is seriously interesting.. lol.. the instruction booklet is in chinese..
chance cards are in chinese..
the places on the board are in chinese! lol.. isnt it interesting? like kunming.. beijing.. shanghai etc..
alright.. next.. i've 2 "me to You" bears here.. i think.. if im not wrong the one with the J is from tk band flutes..
next is a notebook and a story book from lawrence.. lol! its a super nice book la.. i finish reading in like.. 3 days? that's quite a long time i know.. lol..
this is a cologne from camilus.. if i remember correctly.. its a long long time ago.. haiz.. dont know how is he.. he seems hostile lately..
a watch from alvin for my bday this year.. thanks bro..
these are 2 smurfs given to me by beifang! lol.. one conducting and one playing the tuba.. cos smurfs dont play euphonium? i think? lol.. so she got the closest to euphonium.. which is a tuba.. lol! cute right?
stars with msges by 1SG5.. my acjc class.. lol! woohoo! really nice stuff.. its suppose to be in a container.. but i cant remember what i used the container for.. so the stars are left with the rest of my cards.. lol.. seriously damn nice..
oooh.. this is a collection of most of my cards.. given to me on my bday.. lol.. there're alot more.. but its all deep inside my cupboard.. these are the more accesible ones..
i think there're alot more.. sorry if i miss out any gifts from u guys out there.. its really too many to show everyone.. but.. seriously.. all the gifts really mean something to me eh..
thanks to all my friends.. my pals who's made my life more meaningful! THANKS!
P.S. sorry for the poor quality eh.. cos took it with my webcam.. lazy to take out my digi cam..lol. just make do yeah?
jovan blogged at 2:58 AM
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Friday, October 14, 2005
memories.. how wonderful it can be.. a storybook to everyone's life.. providing us a nostalgic escape from the tormented days of the present...
lol.. was just packing my stuff.. cleaning my shelves.. came across a box.. which contained cards.. birthday cards.. xmas cards.. farewell cards.. cny cards.. and some other gifts.. just brings back so much memories.. of cos.. happy and sad ones..
so many pple i've came across in life.. so many experiences.. someone once mentioned.. life is like a piece of white cloth at birth.. what a wonderful analogy i would say.. as life progresses.. our white cloth will be painted beautifully with beautiful experiences but at the same time.. might suffer some less favourable experience which might stain our piece of white cloth..
is that stain really going to be a stain? are bad experiences just going to affect you for a life-time? i guess.. a piece of wonderfully painted cloth might be beautiful at the end of the day.. but we know its not possible.. in life.. there're bound to be hiccups in life.. we need to grow from these nasty experiences..
just like.. if we're looking at 2 trees.. one of which.. has been watered.. and taken care of everyday.. one which has not gone thru stormy days.. the other has to go thru stormy weather.. strong winds.. bad weather conditions.. at the end of the day.. which is a stronger tree?
i would think.. overcoming negative experiences is most difficult in life.. how we actually grow out of it and become more resilience is most crucial.. its a life skill..
well.. memories.. lol.. i've pretty beautiful memories.. i'll just share abit of my life story.. i think.. life stories are beautiful.. it just paints the picture of a person.. his life.. his piece of white cloth..
alright.. here i go..
i dont remember much of my kindergarden days though.. my mum enrolled me to bethel play centre.. a place which all my little cousins went to after me.. LOL.. i remember quite clearly.. i resisted pretty violently during the first few weeks of school.. i would always want to make sure my mummy is in school with me.. but.. as time went by.. lol.. she thought its time for me to learn to be more independent.. well.. eventually somehow.. i did..
my mum.. an important figure in my life.. she's just such a wonderful person.. someone who understands me.. even without me telling her what im going thru.. someone who supports me in everything i do.. someone who never fail to give me strength when i need it most.. though she was pretty strict when i was young.. but.. like all parents would say.. "its for your own good".. lol.. yeah.. i dont think i'd have come thus far without such a wonderful mum! thanks mum!
alright.. later on.. i went on to montfort junior school.. mum enrolled me there as its pretty near home.. pri sch days..
pri 1.. lol.. was in 1c.. i remember i had an old man who teaches chinese, by the name of mr koh, as my form teacher.. a very gentle old man.. lol! was really great time.. had really good friends.. one of whom is kenneth lin.. he was my partner in class.. oh yah! and kevin daniel pillay.. who later on graduated with me in sec 4 in the same class!
pri 2.. 2cc... morning session.. at times.. really dread going to school. lol.. had to wake up so freaking early.. just to go to school! i cant really remember my pri 2 teacher's name.. but she's a nice lady too.. well.. pri 2.. nothing much happened.. lol.. kenneth lin was still my friend..
alright.. then later on to pri 3.. pri 3 c.. mr patrick lee was my form teacher.. this time if i remember correctly.. i joint the "choir"... lol.. some useless singing club under mrs dolly wan.. somehow i cant recall much of my pri 3 days.. lol. shouldnt be too wonderful then.. oh yah! i remember terror ms chow! wow.. she was the discipline mistress and my EL teacher.. everyone just shivers at her name.. she punish pple by putting rubber bands at all 5 of their fingers.. and pull it back and let go.. WOOHOO! imagine how a small kid is going to take it.. LOL.. but she's nice too la.. at least i've seen her nice side..
pri 4.. 4ee.. had a super violent form teacher.. johnny heng if i remember correctly.. WOW.. the way he pulls your ear.. after he let go.. for a moment.. u just wonder if your ear is still intact! im serious.. well.. lol.. this year.. i joined the computer club.. lol.. and had a chiobu teacher in-charge of us! woohoo.. ms lai.. heard she's gave birth and become super out of shape now.. lol.. too think.. i once had a crush on her.. cody was my partner in computer club.. lol.. who's later on my band major in band.. i didnt realise i was in the same pri 4 class as many TILL recently.. pple like.. weiguang.. kelvin liao.. if im not wrong..
pri 5.. 5a.. mr tay.. lol! a super interesting teacher.. who tells us lots bout science.. and what goes on in the world.. but.. later on.. we grow up to know that he has been lying to us! lol! i mean not all la.. but some stuff.. but well.. a really great teacher! but pretty strict.. he canes your hand if u fail to finish your homework.. lol! well.. too bad corporal punishments have been abolished..
pri 6.. 6bb i think.. mrs lau.. had really 2 wonderful buddies.. roy teo and ronald ong.. both are my super good friends.. lol.. used to go to ronald's house to play chinese chess (NO PUN.. dont think dirty).. as in.. seriously chinese chess.. slack at his house.. etc.. lol.. really missed those times.. though we met up couple of times when in sec 1.. but roy shifted soon.. to some where pretty far away.. if im not wrong.. bukit timah? oh yah.. my first school trip was when i was in p6! went to chiangmai to visit the montfort over there.. a really fun trip! lol.. and my last day of school ended pretty badly.. lol.. got caught by mr lock for talking to my friend.. LIKE.. wth! we're not in jail la.. cannot talk meh? lol.. yeah.. so he pulled my hair till it a small patch almost came off..
yeah... didnt score well for PSLE.. so ended up in montfort sec.. a place where majority of montfort junior kids went to.. lol! sec 1.. had a old man as my form teacher again. .this time an english teacher.. well.. nothing much happened.. im just glad that im in the same class as ronald! lol.. oh well.. who would ever know we ended up in the same class till sec 4! what i remember most was the CCA orientation day.. wow! every CCA just look so wonderful to a sec 1 boy.. lol.. but in the end.. i chose the band.. and i never regretted..
this was also the year i took part in the swimming meet.. lol.. i got 4 gold medals.. 50 m, 100 m, 200 m and open 100 breaststroke.. lol! was quite proud of myself.. haha..
sec 2 days.. nothing much happened.. but this is the year.. i knew i have fallen in love with music.. i knew this is what i want.. and i wanna do it.. this is also the year.. that i met dr lee, who has always been a mentor to me.. i think.. the first question he asked me.. which i remember very clearly.. was.. "dont your parents object to you doing music?".. well... i didnt know what he mean earlier on.. but later on.. i realise how much i had to go thru in convincing my parents this is right for me.. lol..
sec 3 days.. had a pretty bad form teacher.. lol.. but really wonderful class! well.. though this is the year that i really had my first major disappointment.. felt like i hit rock bottom.. its like.. when the committee of the band was announced.. when i found out i got the librarian post.. i was really disappointed.. i wanted to be the concertmaster badly.. lol.. but i grew from it.. i took my job with pride.. and did a pretty neat job out of it..
sec 4.. woohoo.. again.. class was wonderful.. the camaraderie.. its a wonderful class.. with wonderful teachers.. like mr low, ms sim, mdm zurina, suxue etc.. woohoo! this was one of the best years of my life i must say.. though mugging for o's was really dreadful.. but i pulled thru it.. 4s2'001 forever.. the spirit is still there..
alright.. later on i went to college.. had a wonderful class.. i must really say.. first was SB4.. made some really good friends.. pple like doina, jamie, derek and of cos KAREN, who went with me to SG 5 later on.. lol.. woohoo.. SB4.. why wonderful memories? its because we went thru fun-o-rama as a class! its really a cool experience to have gone thru acjc's fun fair! the preparation.. the planning.. really brings the class together! i remember me trying to learn to chop the coconuts the day before the funfair.. and screwed it up badly.. lol.. ended up giving the coconuts to my band seniors, marc ho and yolande.. LOL.. of cos they gladly accepted..
well well.. later on.. SG5.. karen kirk.. lol.. always laughing at my nonsense.. a realy close friend.. someone whom i can confide in.. yeah.. lol.. went all the way to some ulu mac at your place to mug la! if u remember.. that was a crazy experience.. anyway.. had wonderful friends. like.. clarice.. lisa.. don baey.. jefferson.. and the list goes on.. i cant remember names.. but definitely faces..
acjc band.. the place.. which i really dread leaving.. i wish i can be an acjc band member forever.. lol! thank God they have acswo.. well.. when i was in jc 1.. i had wonderful seniors.. in my section.. zandra (SL) and sheena (QM).. lol.. sectionals often ended up as slacktionals.. into a session when we share "sensitive" jokes.. LOL! other seniors are pple like.. yolande.. marc ho.. zheng chang.. the 4 beauties from the percussion.. and the list goes on.. this is the place that i met wonderful teachers.. like.. mrs afzal, mr paul cheong, mdm lim, ms sng.. yeah. really cool teachers!
my batchmates for band! woohoo! of cos i will never forget the farkov brothers! lol.. spending so much quality time together.. the time we spent WC3-ing during our promos and davis' As.. to the time we ate chicken rice without paying at dover! lol.. of cos.. wonderful friends i've met.. despite all the suannings i get from them.. lol! pple like.. ruoxi.. derek tse.. beifang.. claudia.. mandy.. etc.. kinda getting a brain dead.. its 3 am!
nvm.. i'll press on.. sadly.. i left college in feb.. was such a painful decision.. when i broke the news to my classmates.. karen cried. LOL.. and she scolded me for being heartless.. cos i just smiled.. holding my tears back.. later on.. i told ruoxi.. she cried also.. lol! wah lao.. and i cant do anything bout it.. and its a band day.. didnt know what to do.. but eventually. decided to go home..
this part has been a secret for a long time.. the truth is.. after i reached home.. I CRIED LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW.. i just covered myself in blanket and kept crying.. i knew there's no turning back.. so i just had to move on..
later on.. got to know many wonderful pple.. ppl like roy lan.. yina.. jacq.. though i dont know nicole yet. but yeah. later on.. got to know nicole from this bunch of pple.. lol.. really had a great time hanging out together!
helping out at tk band was wonderful! its just such a wonderful place which taught me many lessons.. the students are just so warm.. looking at the gifts on my birthday. the cards.. the msges which they wrote.. just touches my heart.. though its only 7 months.. its a good 7 months spent..
acs barker.. another wonderful place with wonderful students.. lol! though i dread going for acs b band practices at first.. just make me lose my voice every single practice.. but.. as i see them grow.. it just warms my heart.. well.. went thru quite alot with them.. though didnt have the chance to go thru SYF with u guys.. again .. its a good 2 years spent..
nafa.. wonderful friends.. valerie, lifeng, karen, daniel, emmanuel, gwen, faith and so on.. wonderful lecturers.. mr goh of cos.. mr yap.. yeah..
to sum it all up.. cos im falling asleep.. my life has been wonderful! i'll talk more on some areas when im more awake.. i guess it must be commendable if u read this crap till this far.. LOL! alright.. bye..
jovan blogged at 1:50 AM
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Thursday, October 13, 2005
yeah.. finally got my enlistment letter.. gonna enlist on 13th december.. not to tekong.. but to police academy.. so yeah.. will be kinda uncontactable from then on.. probably will be free only on weekends..
lol.. was kinda disappointed initially.. its like.. when all my friends are going to tekong.. im going to police academy.. but after some time.. i kinda learn to appreciate it.. since its God's will.. yeah..
well well well.. kinda excited bout it now.. lol! i've no idea what to expect from it.. and no idea what to prepare.. like my friends who just went to tekong.. they have friends to tell them that they need this.. they need that.. but.. i dont! i guess i just have to learn along the way..
my parents wanna go for the thing.. though.. i strongly discourage my mum from going.. LOL! i bet she wouldnt be able to take it and will get super duper emo.. yeah.. but i doubt i'll miss home.. i'll just miss my CDs.. my books.. my music.. yeah.. probably getting a nano as companion.. but heard it kinda suck.. oh well.. its better than living without music for 2 weeks right?!
alright.. soon.. i'll be part of "a force for the nation"..
jovan blogged at 3:45 PM
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